Leap day, Beach Walk, Expensive Gauc. Thursday 2/29/2024

     I started my day with writing, and coffee. There is good coffee at a spot called B of Bros right by my hotel. I ate a Bob’s Red Mill bar to keep me from getting hangry. Dave met me at 10:45, and we headed to Birrieria Robles. The internet tells me they specialize in goat Birria. So, apparently Dave got to eat goat when he was there. I need to catch up to one of these delicious little bastards. I gotta score to settle….. (If you know, you know…) The nerve, they we closed. We consulted the Google Maps and found another place I had saved from my “research”. We made a 9 block walk over to a place called Tacos De Birria “El Banquito” I ordered the 4 Tacos de Birria mas un consume, for $70 pesos. Dave ordered 2, and a big ass quesadilla. He did not realize the size, but the second guessing of our waiter, and the $80 peso price tag should have been a dead giveaway. This was an excellent meal, and topped my first Birria experience. The waiter was a charming fellow who enjoyed bantering with Dave about his “No sabollas”. Dave has a genetic defect that causes onions to taste bad to him. I feel sorry for the fellow, as this is a hassle. However, with communication it is not that hard for him to avoid them here.

     At some point on this day I had the privilege of exchanging some txt messages with my friend Nicole. She was adamant that a place called Si Senior’s was the best guacamole in town. Dave, and I were headed to a rocky beach south of town. It is called Conchas Chinas Beach. I fellow from the bar top at Monzon Brewing Co. had told us to check this place out for the tide pools. As we made our way there, we passed Si Senior’s. We had a good time “people watching” on our way. Once at the beach, we reckoned we probably shoulda planned to get there at low tide. This kinda thing is pretty typical when Dave and I travel together.

     After our late breakfast we regrouped with a stop through a pharmacy, to solve Dave’s tummy troubles. As well as stops through our hotels. We departed Dave’s with tall cans of Victoria in hand. Victoria is a Mexican style Vienna lager. First brewed in 1865. For a short period of time. Mexico was part of the the Austro-Hungarian, Hapsburg empire. Through some political shit, Napoleon the 3rd of France was in charge. Some German speaking folks showed up here and started brewing beer. Today, Victoria is a 4% ABV can of pedestrian deliciousness.

     We made our way back to the sandy beach, and were soon swimming in the surf. We tried to body surf, but neither one of us is very good at it. At one point a good wave caught me. It took me down for a good 2.5x roll under water. When the waves come in here. They pick up a swirl of the fine sand. It got deposited in my ears, hair, and nether regions.

     After a good 20 minutes of water play, we headed to Si Senior’s. Dave got an Aperol Spritz, and I got the Modelo Negra. We noted that the Guac was the most expensive of the trip, and decided we were going to tell Nicole a white lie, and that we never made it here. I’m not paying $265 pesos for fricken chips and guac! So, when the waiter came back by we ordered chips and guacamole. $15.59 USD is the conversion. It would be silly to miss out on the best guac in PV because of my shrewdness. A fellow showed up table side, and showed us the plate of ingredients, and asked for consent. Dave said his signature “No sobollas”, and the man went to work preparing it in a Molcajete. However, he did not use a pestle, he just used a spoon. He had 4 halves of Avocado. He really creamed the first half. Then, he mashed the other 3 halfs, and folded in all the other ingredients. I saw him add some salt, and pepper, but he never tasted it. Her served us, and went on his way. Dave, and I talked it over as we dipped a couple chips. This was mediocre guacamole. I took the lime I did not put in my beer, and squeezed it in. After a taste, Dave said “you do the salt.” I gave a shake, and tasted the top layer. Not enough. I gave another big shake, and a homogenous mix. This was now very good Guac. Kenji (J. Kenji Lopez-Alt. Author of The Food Lab) tells us that most home cooks salt at 1% by weight. Most high end restaurants are closer to 2%. In my home cooking I have been experimenting with this while using my gram scale to monitor the total weight of ingredients. For my kitchen experiments 1.5-2% is my goal. I typically aim for 1.5%. I don’t want to have to start taking those blood pressure pils, and you can’t take salt back out.

     After consuming the most expensive guac of the trip. We decided beers, and pool time in the “Zona Bro-Mantica” at Dave’s hotel would be a good use of time. We stopped and picked up a 4 pack of Victoria and 2 cans of Bohemia. On our way, the sand in my undies started to chafe my supple, tender, inner thighs in a bad way. I utilized a waddle to prevent any more damage. Dave has a thick plastic bag that he purchased for $0.05 in Seattle. He fills it with ice and beer. Dave is an excellent travel companion! Up top by the pool are some very nice private shower rooms. I utilized one to get the sand out of my ears, and undies. When I saw the amount of sand folded into my drawers, I understood why it was so uncomfortable. It was at least a tablespoon. I felt guilty about leaving it in the shower, but good about keeping it out of the pool.

     After my shower, I sun-screened up. We put in a good 3 pint each, pool shift. The pool is right above the line for Pancho’s Tacos. The tourist say Pancho’s is the best in town. I told Dave, I had decided that I am going to give them a try. The line was only half way to the end of the block. After my first pint, I was not hungry yet. Motivation was coming as I started my second pint. As I cracked my third (I love that sound) Dave and I concluded that on Friday afternoon I would have some free time. Dave will be meeting up with his friends, and family. Who are all arriving today, Friday. 

     After getting dry clothes on. We soon found ourselves at this town’s outstanding craft brewery. Funny how it works out, Monzon Brewing Co is 1 block from my hotel. The other brewery, Los Muertos sucks at making beer. However, the internet tells us they have great pizza. There is a server at Monzon I have taken a fancy to. My first interaction whit her was very awkward. I could not remember any of my Spanish words in her presence. She speaks excellent English, but I was having trouble finding those words too. She is fucking beautiful. I reckon early 30s. Dave thinks her facial features are from Aztec genetics. After a quick google image search, I believe he is correct. I thinks her ass is from Spanish genetics… Last night she was wearing these denim shorts that seemed to hug every crease of that beautiful Derriere. Her coworker even teased us about it, as we found seats at the bar.

     Dave held me captive at that bar top longer than I should have. My intoxication got ahead of my food consumption. There was a cute lady across the bend of the bar. She was a beautiful blonde, with “hooded eyes” It is a facial feature I became aware of a few years back. One of my most beautiful lady friends self described herself as having them. This facial feature is common of white folks of northern, and eastern European ancestry. Other ethnicities have them too. I have learned that I find white lady’s with these eyes to be extremely attractive. I caught this girl looking at me twice. I don’t know if she found me attractive, or if she was amused by my ass staring. Finally, we got some good pizza at Los Muertos. I got water with mine. Dave tells me his “Revenge IPA” was actually good. So, that is one beer out of 4 tried. We had just one more back at Monzon, and called it a night.